


Peter's crazy life

by poisonedstucky



Series: Peter Parker's field trips [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes - Freeform, Embarrassed Peter Parker, Field Trip, Field trip tropes are amazing, Flash thompson - Freeform, Fluff, Gen, Irondad, Loki - Freeform, Meme Lord Shuri (Marvel), Natasha being a mom, Peter Parker's Field Trip to Stark Industries, Protective Wanda Maximoff, Pure, The Avengers Are Good Bros, Thor - Freeform, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Vines, Wanda Maximoff - Freeform, What Have I Done, also peter and shuri r best buds, clint being a dumbass, flash being a asshole, im sorry idk how to tag, natasha romanov - Freeform, spiderson, steve rogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-11-01 10:24:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17865524
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poisonedstucky/pseuds/poisonedstucky
Summary: Peter Parker gets a permission slip.To go to his house. He isn't too worried, until...All of the avengers come. ALL. OF. THEM.





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first post!!!! please be respectful <3  
> also, just reminder, Aunt May is dead bc of infinity war, but not from the snap. if you guys want I'll make a chapter abt May's death. ALSO!!!!! this is two years after infinty war happened so peter is a senior

"I have a exciting announcement kids!" Mr. Harrington said. 

Peter was just about to leave the class. He knew happy came early on Mondays, so he wouldn't have to wait to go home.

"Mr. Parker. Please sit down, you can wait to get out of class." Peter sighed. Mr. Harrington gave out permission slips.

"We are going on a field trip to... STARK INDUSTRIES!" Mr. Harrington said as the teenagers all cheered. 

"Ready to show everyone how much of a liar you are?" Flash snickered. Peter just groaned.

Peter managed to sneaked out of the classroom while the commotion was going on.

Peter got into the car. "Hi Happy." Peter said. 

"What's that in your hand?" Happy asked.

"Oh, um, it's n-nothing... justapermissionsliptogotostarkindustries..." Peter blurted out.

"I swear to god Peter, your life is crazy." Happy sighed. He felt pity for the kid.

"Tell me about it. I don't even want to tell dad." Peter sighed. He really didn't want to go on this field trip. For starters, his identity could be revealed, and the Avengers would embarrass him. 

Oh god. Peter thought. He couldn't even imagine what would happen if the Avengers were there. 

Peter decided to text Ned and MJ and explain what's going to happen. 

///

"my friends call me MJ": peters going to the trip. i swear.

"im watching porn?": dude ur life is so bizarre i wish i could be in ur shoes

me: im gonna convince dad to not let me go and if he makes me go im going to commit not alive™

"my friends call me MJ": press f to pay respects

"my friends call me MJ": f

"im watching porn?": f

///

Peter got a notification from Shuri. 

///

meme soulmate: pETER IM COMING TO UR HOUSE ON THURSDAY AND STAYING FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK 

me: hoLY SHIT YAY

me: wait a minute

me: sHURI IM GOING TO A TRIP WITH MY CLASS TO STARK INDUSTRIES ON THURSDAY

me: im gonna kill dad

meme soulmate: oMFG IM DYINSRHUYF

meme soulmate: i feel so bad for u bc im pretty sure all the avengers (i mean all of them) are coming lmfao

me: im going to commit not alive 

meme soulmate: take me with u lmao

///

Peter was going to kill his father.


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so the field trip will have 3 parts, this being the first one oof

"Ok kids, please be respectful because this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and we do not want to ruin it." Mr. Harrington quickly said before leaving the bus. 

"Do you think Thor is going to be there?" Ned asked excitedly. The boy could not stop pondering Peter with questions. 

Peter asked Tony about who was going to be there last night. To Peter's dismay, Tony said all of them, because he wanted the students to have a good surprise. Peter almost had a heart attack.

"I can't tell you. It's classified, but I can tell you you're in for a surprise." Peter said, trying not to get noticed. "All I know is that da-Mr. Stark will be there." Ned grinned.

"Wow penis, found someone else to believe your lies?" Flash smugly said.

"Nobody asked for your opinion Flash, so you better shut the fuck up." MJ said, glaring at Flash.

Flash stopped talking. Peter thanked MJ. 

"Hello everyone! I am Emily and I will be your tour guide today. I will be handing out badges for all of you. These badges will not be usable tomorrow so nobody else can use it for safety measures, so don't try using them again. Any questions?" Emily said. 

"What do the badges mean?" A girl asked. 

"Good question. The badges are leveled 1-10. Level 1 are for visitors. Level 2 are for janitors. Level 3 is for new security guards. Level 4 are for new interns. Level 5 is for tour guides, medium trained interns, and security. Level 6 are for the highly trained interns. Level 7 are for some bodyguards. Level 8 is for Happy Hogan, Tony Stark's personal bodyguard. Level 9 is for visiting family and some Avengers that don't visit often. Level 10, the highest level, is for the Avengers that live here, Tony Stark of course, and Pepper Potts." Emily stated. 

"What's your level?" Ned asked. 

Peter checked. "Shit, it's level 10." 

Emily smiled. "Hi Peter! What are you doing out of school early?" 

"Hi Emily, I'm here on a school trip." Peter said, sounding a little annoyed at the last part.

Emily started laughing. "Oh my god St-Parker, only something like this can happen to you!" 

"Yeah, I know." Peter said. He wanted to die. 

"Emily Miller. Level 5 tour guide." FRIDAY said as Emily scanned her badge. 

Some students jumped at FRIDAY, while Peter was trying not to laugh. 

"This is FRIDAY, one of Tony Stark's AI's. She controls everything in the building." Emily said.

"Alexa Williams. Level 1 visitor."

"Sophia Roberts. Level 1 visitor."

"Aaliyah Johnson. Level 1 visitor."

"Eugene Thompson. Level 1 visitor." Flash smirked when FRIDAY said his name.

All of the students scanned their badges.

"Peter Parker. Level 10. Hello Peter. Would you like me to inform boss of your arrival?" 

"Uh, no Fri, I'm here for my school trip." Peter said quickly.

"Very well. Natasha Romanoff got here 2 hours ago. I'll tell her you're here. Enjoy the tour Peter!" 

Everyone stared awestruck at Peter. 

"Well, shall we get started?" Emily said, trying to distract the class. Peter mouthed her a thank you. 

They went to the elevator.

"FRIDAY, please take us to the 5th floor." Emily requested.

"Going to the 5th floor." 

"We will eat first, then we will go on the tour. It's better to eat first instead of stopping in the middle of the trip." Emily said. 

Everyone got out of the elevator. 

"You can sit wherever you want. The food is free so help yourself." Emily said with a smile. 

Peter had already ate a lot this morning, so he just sat down and texted Shuri.

///

meme soulmate: yOooOOooOooOOOo peter whr u at 

me: dude i just got here im at the lunch room on the 5th floor chilllll

meme soulmate: dood get ready for a surprise

me: oh god that could mean anything

me: btw whr r u

meme soulmate: lmao thats classified i legit cant tell u

me: god what is dad planning

meme soulmate: oH RITE U DONT KNOW

meme soulmate: god get ready brotha

me: i wanna commit not alive

meme soulmate: phat mood

/// 

"Who are you texting penis?" Flash asked.

"None of your business." Peter said quickly.

///

me: gOD i hate these people

meme soulmate: tell me who it is ill kill em

me: sHURI NO

meme soulmate: im not the princess of wakanda for nothing

///

"I can't believe you hacked into Tony Stark's AI." Flash said.

"I didn't." Peter said back, ignoring him to talk to Shuri.

"Can't you just accept the fact that Peter actually works here?" MJ said.

"Penis Parker isn't smart enough to-"

"Excuse me?" Peter heard a familiar voice.

Uncle Steve.

"I-uh-" Flash stuttered.

"Bullying is not tolerated here especially to our best intern." Steve said sternly. 

"I-uh- I-I'm s-sorry..." Flash said. 

"Good. That's one strike for you, Mr. Thompson." Steve said. 

"Uncle Steve, you didn't have to do that..." Peter said.

"Don't worry about it kid. Also, here's the cookies Bucky made you, he knows they're your favorite." Steve smiled.

"Oh my god tell uncle Bucky I love him." Peter took the cookies.

"No problem." Steve said."

"What happened to your arm? It has bruises on it." Peter said. 

"Oh, um, I was fighting Bucky this morning." Steve said.

"Oh, seems like the arm is working. Any updates needed on it?" Everyone was quiet. Peter was talking to THE Captain America.

"He said it was a little heavy, and to make the fingers more flexible." Steve said, ruffling Peter's hair.

"Ok then. Anything for your shield?" Peter said.

"Make it more light, it's extremely heavy." Steve said. 

"You grandpa." Peter said, chuckling. 

"I'm grounding you from Bucky's cookies." Steve said with a grin.

"nOOOO UNCLE STEVE I'M SORRY" Peter said while Steve walked away.

"God, now my hair is messed up because of him." Peter said while trying to fix his hair.

"Dude, you just talked to THE Captain America!" Ned said.

"Dude, calm down, he's basically my father to me." Peter said. Everyone started talking again, but about Peter. 

"All right everyone, we're going to start moving to the training space. While you wait for our special guests, you can look at the weapons." Emily said.

When all of them were going there, Flash decided to tease Peter. "How much dick did you have to suck to make Captain America act like he knew you Penis?" 

"That's disgusting. Can't you understand I have a internship? Or is your IQ that low?" Peter said.

"You little sh-" 

"Hello маленький паук." Natasha said. Everyone stared in awe.

"oh my god is that Black Widow?!"

"wait, is she talking to Peter?!"

"omg she's so hot." (A/N: phat mood")

"маленький паук! OH MY GOD I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SURVIVED!" Peter hugged Natasha, and Natasha hugged back.

"I had to see my маленький паук." Natasha said with a smile.

"Movie night?" Peter asked.

"It's Bucky's choice tonight." Natasha said with an annoyed tone.

"Ugh, he has the worst choices." Peter rolled his eyes.

"You know it's not nice to talk shit about people Peter." Bucky said putting his hand to his heart. Everyone's jaws dropped. The Winter Solider was there.

"Admit it uncle Bucky. You pick bad 70's movies. Ew." Peter said with a smile.

Bucky sighed. "Fine. But you have to help me pick out the movies Pete."

"Fine. By the way, am I grounded from your cookies?" Peter said with a sad face.

"Haha. No Pete, Steve was just joking around. He's stupid like that." Bucky smiled.

"We been knew sis." Peter agreed.

"Oh, I see our guests have arrived. Everyone, please applaud to Winter Solider and Black Widow!" Emily smiled. 

Everyone applauded, mouths gaping about Bucky and Natasha talking to Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please leave kudos uwu <3


	3. Chapter Three

"Today we will be teaching you the basics of fighting." Natasha said. 

"Who would like to volunteer?" Bucky said. 

Everyone's hand went up. 

"Peter, why don't you try?" Natasha said.

Peter sighed. "It's always me..." Peter whispered.

"Don't go easy on me мать-паук." Peter said.

"I never do." Natasha smirked. 

Everyone watched as the two spiders fought eachother. Finally, Peter was able to hold Natasha in a choke hold.

"Ok, ok, I yield ребенок паук." Natasha said while Peter laughed. Everyone was shocked that Peter had won.

"God, you've won against me the last two times we've fought too. Taking lessons from Barnes?" Natasha said. Peter nodded.

"Wow. Well you're getting good Peter." Natasha said. "Thanks Aunt Nat!" Natasha gave him a kiss on the cheek and left with Bucky.

Everyone just stayed still. They were shocked. THE BLACK WIDOW had just kissed Peter Parker. 

"Um, let's move on to the Famous Avengers Weapons section." Emily said, trying to break the silence.

Everyone started talking again. Peter was not excited to go to the weapons section. His spidey senses were acting up. 

"Omg did THE Black Widow just give you a kiss on the cheek?" Ned said in awe. 

"She's like a mother to me Ned. It's not a big deal." Peter said.

They got to the 35 floor. Once the door opened, there was a loud noise. 

"HELLO MIDGUARDIANS!" A voice boomed.

Thor.

Everyone was starstruck looking at the god. It was freaking Thor of all people.

"PETER TONYSON!" Thor said. He hugged Peter but the hug lifted Peter up. He was in the air now.

"Uncle Thor! I haven't seen you in forever!" Peter smiled.

Thor let the kid down. "We should catch up! Training tomorrow?" 

"Sure!" Peter said.

"Who are these mini humans? And which ones are your friends?" Thor asked.

"Oh, it's my class, I'm on a field trip. These are my friends, Ned and MJ.

"Hello Ned and MJ. Nice meeting you." Thor said.

Ned looked like he was about to faint, while MJ just looked surprised and starstruck, which was rare.

"I'm going to be showing you the weapons for the Avengers, which Peter works on. Peter, can you open up your lab?" Thor said.

"Um, sure." Peter remembered Thor had a level 9 badge, which meant he couldn't get into Peter's lab. He scanned his badge and went in.

"Hello Peter. Boss said to make a new shield for Steve Rogers, make small adjustments to Bucky Barnes's metal arm, and to make more of Clint Barton's arrows. That is all sir." Karen said.

"Thanks Karen. Please bring out the Famous Avengers Weapon section." Peter said. 

"Ah, Thank you Peter Tonyson. As you can see, these are the famous weapons of the Avengers. Any questions before wandering off to see the weapons?" Thor asked. 

Emily was dumbfounded. She had never been here, so it made sense for Thor to lead the tour. 

"What's going on Peter?" Emily whispered. Meeting Tor was not on the schedule. 

"Dad's planning something. Not sure what." Peter said. Emily nodded.

"What's that voice?" Someone asked Thor. 

"You should not be asking me, but Peter Tonyson!" Thor brought Peter to the front, right next to him. 

"Um, this AI is not FRIDAY, it is my personal AI, Karen." Peter said.

"Why do you call Peter "Peter Tonyson?" Someone asked Thor.

"Good question. I call him that because him and Stark are very close, almost like father and son. So I have this inside joke where I call him Peter Tonyson instead of Peter Parker just to tease him." Thor ruffled Peter's hair.

"Now you can wander about. Don't touch anything." Thor said.

"Ah, Peter, Loki will come into this room in a while. He said he missed you. See you later Tonyson." Thor said as he flew off. 

Flash smacked Peter's head."I can't believe you know so many Avengers with your "real" internship Penis. Just admit it, you'll never be as smart as the actual interns. Wait 'till I'm an actual intern here." Flash smirked.

"Excuse me Emily, but I have a question. Is Pen-Peter Parker an actual intern here?" Flash smirked. He already knew Emily's answer.

"Yes he is, and he's the smartest one here too. You're lucky he's in your class." Emily smiled to Flash. Peter blushed at the compliment.

Flash was fuming. "How much did you pay her Penis? Oh wait, you're broke, who's dick did you suck?" Flash snickered.

"Excuse me?!" A female voice said.

"Aunt Wanda!" Peter said.

"Hello Peter." She hugged Peter. "I would love to talk right now but this little punk has been insulting you for the past few moments." Wanda said, red glowing in her eyes.

"I-um- I'm Peter's friend! W-We were just joking around!" Flash stuttered. 

"You little liar. Don't you know I can read your mind? You idiot." Wanda hissed.

Peter tried to block Wanda. "wOaH aunt Wanda, let's not kill someone today." 

Wanda calmed down. "Fine. But I'm telling Tony and Steve about this Pete." 

"Aunt Wanda! Can't there be any other way?" Peter asked.

Wanda smiled at Peter. "Look, I know this is hard, but I have to tell them. To make it up to you! Also, be careful, I came here to warn you that Loki is coming here. He might kill that boy. Be careful!" Wanda said before flying off.

"Penis, did you sleep with her for her to do that? Wow, you're desperate." Flash said.

"Flash can you stop being a fucking idiot for once? She just threatened you dumbass. Just accept it." Peter said. He was just pissed off now.

"I'll never believe it Penis. I don't care." Flash said. 

A snake crawled up Flash's arm. "WHAT THE FUCK? THERE'S A FUCKING SNAKE HERE!" All the students were screaming.

Peter laughed. "Here, give the snake to me." The snake crawled up Peter's arm.

"Loki, you can come out now. You scared everyone." Peter said while Loki turned into his normal form. 

"God Peter, your classmates are complete pussies." Loki chuckled.

"Loki! That wasn't nice. You have to go to Thor. You can't interfere right now. I'm on a field trip." Peter said, annoyed.

"Fine Peter, but I'll be back to kill this nuisance." Loki said before leaving.

"Ok students, we are going to the technology section now." Emily said. 

"Dude, was that Scarlet Witch? And Loki, the guy who did the attack on new york?" Ned asked.

"Don't talk about him, he's probably going to be back in a second." Peter said.

Everyone went into the elevator.

"Floor 45 please FRIDAY." Emily said. 

"Sorry Ms. Miller. You are not authorized to go there." FRIDAY said.

"Don't worry Emily." Peter said. "Fri, please go to floor 45." Peter said.

"You know Penis, if the AI wont let the tour guide go, it's not gonna let a dumbass lying 17 year old go there eith-" Flash was cut off by FRIDAY.

"No problem Peter. Going to floor 45." Friday said. Flash instantly shut up.

The elevator got there and everyone got out.

Peter got out and saw Shuri while everyone was stunned, silent.

Shuri spotted Peter. "I LOVE YOU BITCH!" 

"oh my god... I AIN'T NEVER GONNA STOP LOVIN' YOU, BITCH!" Peter said, recreating the vine as well.

Both of the giggled while running up to each other and hugging. 

Peter didn't noticed the silence until he realized. 

The whole group saw him with Shuri.

"Bro, I missed you so much!" Shuri said.

"I missed you too Shuri! Game night?" Peter said.

"Yes! Also, who are these people?" Shuri asked.

"Oh um, these are my classmates, remember?" Peter said.

"Oh, so these are you classmates. Who are your friends?" Shuri asked.

"Oh, it's Ned and MJ." Peter said, pointing to them. Ned looked like a statue while MJ was smiling in excitement.

Wait, smiling?!

"Ah, so you are Ned and MJ! Nice to meet you! Peter has told me alot about you two, especially about Ned. We should talk about programming some day!" Shuri said. 

"Shuri, I'll be back, I have to go to the technology section. Just wait for me, ok?" Peter said.

"Fine. But tell Bucky that I want to play mario kart. I STILL can't believe he beat me." Peter chuckled. 

Shuri was leaving. "Woah Penis, I'm pretty sure your dumbass wouldn't be able to talk with Shuri, was that girl an actor? Now that I think about it, all of the Avengers that you met could have been fake. I mean, you're not smart enough to get a Stark internship, so I wouldn't lie about it." Flash said. 

Shuri turned around. "I'll have you know Peter is EXTREMELY smart. He would never lie, he's too precious to." Peter blushed. Getting complemented is nice, but by Shuri?! That's one hell of an achievement. "Peter didn't even need to apply. He's smart enough to get a internship just like that. Tony saw him and saw he was really smart. He got the internship by himself, douche. Stop being a dumbass and believe it." Shuri left.

Flash stayed quiet. Peter smirked. Finally someone taught him to shut up. Emily was talking about the Technology section. Peter's spidey senses were acting up.

He understood why, once Clint jumped down on Peter's head, yelling "CAW CAW BITCHES I'M A HAWK!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!   
> Kudos are appreciated <3


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter! sorry this was a bit short, but I really had nothing to add on. I'm going to be making more field trip fics tho! <3

Clint was on Peter's shoulders. He knew Peter was strong enough to hold him, since he's done it before. "What the hell uncle Clint?!" Peter said. He was highly confused.

"Get off." Peter said. Clint got off of Peter. 

"Hey guys, I'm here to embarrass Peter." Clint said.

Peter sighed. "Uncle Clint nO-"

"Peter cried when the old lady from "UP" died! He also steals all the cookies from Bucky and we caught him dancing to Britney Spears's Toxic!" Clint said. Peter hid his face and Clint went back in the tunnels. 

"I-Ignore him, he's a dick..." Peter heard a "I HEARD THAT" and giggled.

"Oof, that must be tough." One of Peter's classmates, James, said.

"Honestly, who doesn't dance to Britney Spears?" Alexa said. (A/N: truth sis.)

They went to the last part of the Technology section. 

"Oh, and here comes the CEO, Pepper Potts! You are very lucky to see her, hardly anyone sees her on tours." Emily said.

"Hello Emily. I'm here to talk to Peter. Privately. Is that ok with you, Mr. Harrington?" Pepper said. Mr. Harrington nodded, awestruck.

Peter got brought to the side. "Hi mom. Did aunt Wanda tell you?"

"Yes, she did. I'm trying hard to restrain myself from harming the damn kid. Look Peter, you have to tell us when you're getting bullied. We love you Peter." Pepper kissed Peter on his forehead. 

"Love you too, mom." Peter said. He joined his class while Pepper left. 

"Since we are almost done, we have one more activity left. A Q&A for Mr. Stark!" Emily said. Everyone cheered.

Everyone went to sit down on one of the chairs. Most people wanted to be in the front, But Peter wanted to be in the back, hidden. 

Tony came out of the curtains. "Hello Midtown High!" Everyone clapped, while Peter rolled his eyes when Tony bowed at the cheering.

"We have some... special guests today." Tony said. The avengers came out.

All. Of. Them.

Peter cringed as everyone screamed.

"Ok, so, today we will be answering some questions. Ask away!" Tony said.

Students were asking questions to all of the avengers, while Peter was just trying to not get noticed. Unfortunately, Loki saw him. Peter cringed.

"Um, boy with brown hair in the front." Tony said.

Flash.

"Can high school students become interns here?" Flash asked smugly.

"No." Tony said.

"HA! IN YOUR FACE PENIS! You dumbass liar!" Flash said.

"Flash you fucking moron..." Peter mumbled.

"Excuse me? What did you just call my kid?" Tony said. 

"I-I" Flash stuttered. "U-Um, this kid has been lying about a internship h-here, and-"

"Have you thought for a fact that Peter is WAY more intelligent than you? And the fact that The GODDAMN Avengers has been talking to him like he's family all day ?" Tony said. 

Loki and Wanda started to make Flash float while the rest of the Avengers were getting ready to kill Flash.

"wOaH GUYS WE DON"T NEED VIOLENCE RIGHT NOW WERE GOOD!" Peter said. he was trying to make the Avengers back off.

"He hurt you Pete." Natasha said. 

"And he's saying you're a dumbass, when clearly he doesn't have a brain." Loki said.

"Listen, let's not kill a kid today!" Peter was trying to stop them the best as he could. Flash looked fucking TERRIFIED.

"Get out of my building. NOW." Tony said. 

"B-But, I-I, w-wait-" Flash stuttered before getting dragged away by security guards. 

"Ok then, that wraps up the tour. Thank you for coming to Stark Industries and we hope you have a good day!" Tony said.

"Oh, and by the way teacher, Peter will be staying here, since he'll just be coming here after school." Tony said. Mr. Harrington nodded, dumbfounded of what just happened.

The students got escorted out. "You didn't have to kick Flash out dad." Peter said.

"He deserved it. No one disrespects my kid." Tony said. 

Peter blushed. "T-Thanks guys. You guys are the best family."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that was the last chapter. Thank you for reading! i appreciate it. <3  
> I might make a sequel, but idk. only if you guys want it. also, just to remind you guys, i can write a short story of how aunt may died. only if you guys want it. <3


End file.
